if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
