what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
