Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
