i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
