Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
operation harelip BJ is a go
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
bring money and cleavage
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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