Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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