Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Holy shit dude........stairs
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