Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
