...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
