why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Randomize
