Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
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