i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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