so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
