There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
