this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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