when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize
