Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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