That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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