I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Randomize