Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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