last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
