Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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