So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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