I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
