Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Randomize
