It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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