How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
