She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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