I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
