a queef is a wish your heart makes.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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