Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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