Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
