Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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