I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
