ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
operation harelip BJ is a go
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
