Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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