I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Walk of Shame today included voting.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Randomize
