If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
stop calling my apartment porn island.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
