So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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