o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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