my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
