Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Randomize
