Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
