You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
Randomize
