I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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