What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
