No awkward lesbian experiences without me
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
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