Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
