in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize
