Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
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